A Fine Bromance

Woody Harrelson is one of the green movement’s best known celebrity proponents, and now it appears he’s recruited a troubled Wilson brother to join in his simple, back-to-nature, party boy ways.

Everybody learned Woody and Owen Wilson were up to some kind of hippie antics in Peru after the local celebrity gossip program “Magaly TeVe” famously aired footage last week of the boys bathing in an Andes irrigation ditch clad only in their boxer shorts. The ditch was a spontaneous stop on a visit to an orphanage called Casa de Milagros that the pair helps to fund near the Incan capital of Cuzco. The orphanage was founded by The Chandler Sky foundation, which “aims to provide positive, long-term benefits to the region's social and environmental problems,” according to the website. One of the foundation’s methods is teaching the children farming methods that enable them to use their land over and over in order to conserve the local rainforest (one of the world’s most biodiverse). Other friends of the orphanage include the Red Hot Chili Peppers, New York Jet Curtis Martin, and clothing designer Ted Baker. Travelers can stay at the orphanage for $10 a night and can order organic vegetarian meals, which might not necessarily sound so tempting, but hey, maybe Woody or Owen will show up and take another outdoors bath.

Owen and Woody were staying at a cheap (less than $50 per night) spiritual resort called HanaqPacha Retreat Center , located in the Sacred Valley, which also receives funding from Woody. At the sacred retreat, the two shared an eco-friendly teepee, indulged in the center’s homegrown organic vegetables, and may have even busted into a few yoga poses. The retreat’s website says its peaceful atmosphere and terraced gardens honor Pachamama, or Earth Mother.  

Okay, first of all, why are there no video stills online of the earth fathers being ditch diggers? And secondly, when can we see this footage of the dudes pouring water on each other that we keep hearing about? All that’s available is a photo of the pair in Peru, Woody waving, and Owen in a silly white fedora. Wood and O capped off their spiritual retreat in nature with some hardcore raging in Miami. And all the while, Owen insisted on wearing his fedora.

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I came across and interesting idea. Future news. Here is my attempt:

China shocks the world by revealing the first completely pollution free coal fired power plants are supplying energy to the Olympics. Every gram of carbon the plants produced is trapped and recycled.

In further news it is announced that you may save the environment by getting drunk. Distilled spirits manufacturers finally realized that they could trap and recycle CO2 produced by sour mash fermentation by just a little extra plumbing.

And finally, one of the largest sources of waste paper was eliminated as phone books the world over went on an "opt in" system. After it was realized that many people who communicate via cell phone and internet never even open a phone book, it was easy to cut the number of phone books produced in the world by 90%.

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